Because you know these therapists have all sorts of ideas about what should happen in what order developmentally. I remember when my first little preemie started acting like he was going to skip crawling altogether and go straight to walking my friends adamantly said, “Don’t let him do that! He absolutely has to crawl!” Apparently there’s some theory that it would affect his brain development and he wouldn’t read, would only ever wear the color blue, and never eat vegetables. Not really, except he is a little obsessed about the color blue and rarely eats veggies, but I do remember thinking, “What’s the big deal about the order?”
So when Katie told me, “Eh, oh well.” I was shocked. And a little disappointed to be honest because I thought the next phase was propping him up in the center of the family room seated with a collection of toys within reach to entertain him while I got something else done.
So little man has been practicing flinging himself across the floor if he’s motivated enough to get a toy, usually brother’s. I’m not kidding either, you can tell when he’s winding up for it and then he literally throws his body at said object. It really doesn’t look like crawling because it’s a very jolty, one push movement. Half of the time he completely misses and knocks his head but it really hasn’t slowed him down at all. There are perks to a super high pain tolerance I guess.
It’s exciting that he’s doing so many things physically right now. I think his strength is gross motor. Sure he’s completely uncoordinated and misjudges movements but no one can say he’s not determined. He sees big brother and he just wants so much to connect with him, and his toys, that he’s doing more than I expected.
Let’s just camp there for a moment cause he really is doing so much.
Eating however is another story.
We went to the pediatrician for his 15 month well check last Friday. Each well visit the nurse gives me a hand out of what your baby should be doing by his age. I’ve gotten so I don’t even look at them because it’s too painful. I mean for crying out loud he’s not even eating. When she asks, “So you mean he’s just eating purees and not other solids and meats?” I have to explain again that no he’s not eating any foods at all. Ever. No carrots, no squash, no bananas, no prunes, no applesauce, no muffins, no meats. It underscores how rare it is for someone to not eat by mouth. I’m sure they only encounter patients like this once in a great moon.
After that visit, I stole a peak at the developmental sheet. It said your baby should be saying three to four words at this point and displaying stranger anxiety. Nope. Not really doing that. When it comes to communication he’s been smacking his lips at me like a kiss. I proudly interpret that one as “I love you momma.” So I’ll take that. And stranger anxiety I’ve seen it once, maybe twice. I remember dreading dropping Mac off as a baby because separations were difficult, but with Nathan I would welcome a big quivering lip and crocodile tears. The one time I did see it it from Nathan served as validation for me that, oh yes, I guess we are bonded and belong to each other.
There are so many little things that I daily grieve for what he’s not doing, but for some reason this week I found myself much more settled about who God made Nathan to be. I took him to see my OT friend at the end of the week because I can ask her things and say things I would otherwise hold back on at Dell. She in turn does the same for me. She confessed that when we first got his diagnosis and she read up on it thought, “Oh, Kathy.” As in, “Oh, this is bad. Very bad.” But as she’s met with Nathan she doesn’t see big sensory flags and autistic tendencies in him. She sees him as cognitively delayed but very connected to us. Who knows, that could change next week even, but for now I’ll take every single second of eye contact, scrunchy face smiles, waiting a whole five seconds for him to turn his head to his name. He’s a sweet baby and invading our lives and hearts more and more each day.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ. – Ephesians 1:3
15 Month Stats
Weight – 17 lbs, 5 oz, <2 percentile
Height – 31 in, 45 percentile
Head Circ – 41.5 cm, <2 percentile
My book, Beauty in Broken Dreams: A Hopeful Handbook for the Early Years as a Special Needs Parent, is now available on Amazon!
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